A grown man and his GPS... an odd entanglement of penis envy, get out of the car now.
I have been thinking of discussing this modern day romance of technology for quite some time, but it was only this past weekend that I was propelled into full blown need to publicly discuss this epidemic.
Men. You will always be superior to your GPS unit. Give it a rest.
Here are 3 examples of different bonds men I know have:
Mystery Man #1 Questioning
Mystery Man #2 Defiant
Mystery Man #3 Loyal
Traveling with #1 is a lose-lose situation. Constant wondering whether the alternative route would have yielded better results. Blaming whomever recommended to just go with the original route. Asking rhetorical questions of the little device. Even harassing its speaker for being just a bit too pushy.
Now, you want an adventure, get in the car with #2. Why he purchased a GPS is beyond me since he clearly knows the best route to get everywhere already. You know when you have to silence your GPS because it loses its voice after chastising "Recalculating" too many times, you really don't need one. This type of man enjoys showing his dominance over this little advice that doesn't know sh** about where he wants to go or who he is as a man.
I find #3 endearing. Thank God the GPS was invented, otherwise he would still be in his driveway figuring out how to read a map. He turns all power over to his electronic compass and would follow it into a lake if it asked that of him. Whether it be down the street to the supermarket or cross state lines to a wedding, that good ol' GPS has earned a spot in the Christmas card photo as the best addition to the family this year.
No matter which man yours is, you probably have your own anecdote of some car trip gone wrong or some lane change missed then cursed to high heaven. If only men could accept that they aren't asking for directions by purchasing a GPS unit, they are just asking for a hand. The world might navigate a little more smoothly.
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